Inspired by Finding My Way Home’s blog.

The other day, I wrote a blog about what did I lose when I lost him.  And the answer was, nothing but a narcissist.  But Finding took it another step, what have I gained.  And I am now doing that.  Because I gained SO much more than I lost.  I should thank him.

What did I gain from the past 3 days?

The truth, Bare  and raw, abrasive and sharp, jagged on the edges,  but the truth.

My self esteem

My authenticity

The absence of a need to hide my relationship from people like my son and my best friend, who were sick to death of watching me go down for the count with this man.

My ability to be joyful.

My friend A.

My new friend Megan

A renewed sense that I am courageous enough to show up, to be seen, to enter the arena with no guarantee of the outcome. (Thank you Brene Brown)

Th knowledge that I could fight my way back, when someone took me out for the count. Again.

The knowledge that every time I get knocked down I gain something.

Th knowledge that there are people who won’t knock me down, but will carry me on their shoulders helping me to celebrate.

My life, the opportunity to go back out there and find real,true love.

My heart.  I will do as the Japanese used to, and fill the cracks with gold to mend it, so that when I give it away again it is worth more than it ever was.