Eclipse-ing

We have to find eclipse glasses this morning.  The eclipse will be 75% here, at around 2:45.  We just decided we’re going to go to a beach, because it will be easier to view it, if we find the sunglasses, from the beach. And if we don’t, well, it still will be a cool place to sit in the semi-darkness and absorb the vibe.

I’ve been reading up on the metaphysical effects of a solar eclipse.  Since it messes with our circadian rhythms, (you know, the cycle of light and dark of day and night) it can affect our bodies to have it dark in the middle of the day.  I’ve read that it is often a time of spiritual awakening, because it awakens our third eye chakra.  I’ve read it’s a great time of healing, of emotional wounds, and often brings about a new start, a new path.

Which I guess is why veteran eclipse chasers say if it’s your first eclipse, expect to feel forever changed.  Even if you don’t buy into any of the spiritual effects, it’s still a really cool thing to experience the sun, moon and earth in perfect alignment.  Of course for me, personally, I have to think how could that NOT affect us all?

Well, you know this is right up my alley, lol.  Changes have been brewing and bubbling up as it is in my life lately.  It will be awesome to view this event with someone with whom I feel so connected.  I’ve been so preoccupied in the last few weeks, I’ve only begun to direct my attention toward the eclipse in the last day or so.  Hope I find the eclipse glasses!

Love and light.

Succumbing

running on dunes

There was freedom

In her hair

flowing like ribbons behind her

As she galloped over the clouds and rain

To that place where no one claimed her

Except herself.

She breathed in the scent of love

And picked her way through the dunes

Til she found him

Waiting

With the stars in his eyes

And comets in his hands.

Succumbing,

She knew she was home.

 

By Deborah E. Dayen

Picture from James Arthur Foto via Google Images

Honing My Manifesting Skills

My computer is dying, apparently.  I thought I’d fixed it, but apparently not.  Sometimes it turns on and sometimes it does not.  Thank goodness Dan has a spare lap top I can use till I either resolve it, or get a new one, which seems the likely answer at the moment.

We had a fun day today.  We’ve been talking about getting a boat, somewhere in the 25′ range.  It’s purely a discussion now, but we thought we’d see what slip prices are in the area.  So this morning, after we went for breakfast, we checked out the St. Petersburg Municipal Marina.  It’s a huge marina on Tampa Bay.  We walked around the docks, which was a lot of fun, despite the heat.  Boats from 18′ up to mega yachts over 100′.  The access to Tampa Bay is direct, and it’s really a beautiful location.  Trouble is, it has a 2 year waiting list.  Which is probably ok for us, because at the moment the whole thing is a pipe dream, though there’s a good possibility that it may come to pass one day.  Anyway, it’s a lot of fun think about, and who knows what the future may hold.

I think though, that my heart at the moment is more into our cruise and trip to Italy next spring.  Now that we’ve settled back in here, I plan to go to work on that this week, and contact the travel agent.  I’m pretty excited about this trip, and Dan is too

It’s really cool to dream dreams and have them come true.  I guess I have been honing my manifesting skills for awhile now, lol.  My house in Florida, my new life here, and an amazing man who stands heads above anyone else who’s ever been in my life.  So, Italy is the next thing on my list. Now if I can just manifest winning powerball tickets!

Love and light to all.

 

Peaceful, Easy Feeling

You know what’s nice? Really nice?

To let go of a whole bunch of toxic remnants, loose ends of the bad energy of mistakes made in the past. Letting go of it just by recognizing it, slicing it off, leaving it to smolder in the light. But even more importantly, to have someone beside you that cheers you on, that recognizes your pain and your beauty, on to a brighter and happier future than you ever thought possible. Someone who wants to share it with you, to share with you all the amazing things that life has to offer.

It’s friggin’ NICE.

I still say that we are here to learn our lessons and to evolve our souls. My mistake in the past has been to think that I can help lost souls find peace. That I can, by the sheer power and volume of the love I offer, change someone’s life, and help them out of the doldrums in which they perpetually live.

I think the last and final lesson from a past relationship is that I cannot. The reason is that people need to find that path themselves. My lesson has been that most people don’t want the lesson, they fight the lesson. It’s a dichotomy, because love, pure love is a difficult thing to reject, even if you don’t want the lesson.

Ahh, well, that’s not my problem is it? In fact, I have none at the moment, besides wondering what I will do with the blessing of another day tomorrow. We all have our own journey to make, our own lessons to learn. I think my journey has finally come to an EASY place.

Love and light.

When Things Go South

Up again in the middle of the night.  I am so over tired.  I broke down and took an Ambien which made me sleep about an hour.  I want to sleep for 24 hours straight.  I came back to an uncomfortable situation on the blog after my trip up north and to my sisters.  Charlottesville came into play on a friend’s blog, at least I thought she was a friend.  I disagreed respectfully with her take in a comment to her.  She made a smart remark to me calling me “Miss love and light” which felt kind of like it was intended as an insult. Perhaps she didn’t mean it that way but that’s the way it came out.  I wrote another blog explaining why I sign off every blog with love and light, and what it means to me.  Her blog then disappeared, she claimed.

I guess I have been also irritated with her for a sudden change of heart she has had.  When I kept going back to the narcissist loser Scott repeatedly she got angry at me, yelling at me about what was I doing talking to him.  She was my most vocal critic and had a pet name she called him, Pigshit 2, or PS2 for short.  (PS1 was her own ex.)  I almost had him come down here, and it stopped with a drunken phone call from him, in which he discussed the 24 yr old that had been sexting with him, and how he was worried he’s somehow offended her because she stopped talking to him when he went to see her on his lunch hour.  Apparently, this had been going on for months.  At first, he said 6 months, and later denied it was for that long. Like drunk wasn’t bad enough, I had to hear about this sexting thing with a girl that could have been his granddaughter.  That was the end of that relationship. I remember going to bed shaking, thinking what the fuck was I thinking??  He lost his $500 ticket he’d bought to come down here.  Shortly after I met Dan, and you all know the story there.  We have been together 24/7 since.

The old one, Scott, started commenting on this friends blog, the one who did nothing but encourage me to kick him to the curb.  It was so transparent what he was doing,  Using her blog like a dating site of sorts, flirting with her.  She told me privately that she was just playing with him and would drop the hammer shortly.  I didn’t care if he talked to her at all, but I really thought that since she and I had a long relationship of a couple years, and she knew the pain this man had caused me, she would just tell him off, like she’d been doing behind the scenes for 2 years.  Instead, she has taken up flirting back at him, showing him the same shallow interest he shows her,  while he uses the same lines he used on me…..

Then she would text me and laugh at him behind his back, after his comments.  Most recently, he told her his sister was dying, she said to me she almost asked him if that was like when his mother died twice (a lie he told me when we were together.  He’d disappeared for a few days, ostensibly to take Betty on vacation.  But he told me his mother died.  Then two years later she died again, this time for real.)  So my friend and I were laughing about if this sister was going to die a few times also.  But to his face she went along with it in her blog comments, offering up sympathy and wondering if he wanted to talk about it.

I’ve considered putting up screenshots of the texts, but am choosing not to go that route at the moment.

I”m pretty sure all his comments are for my benefit, save the very few that are about the blog she wrote, and maybe they are for Betty’s benefit too, his old gf of 15 years, who he also treated miserably. I know through my statcounter that he and she both read my blog fairly obsessively (like 10 times yesterday) and this friend knows they both read hers.  Whatever.  I don’t care.  I can’t stop them from reading it, it’s a public blog.

But I’m watching her enjoying the attention she’s getting from a man who totally screwed me over.  A man she yelled at me to stop talking to, to stop writing for.  Just ever so slightly hypocritical.  Not a good friend.

So now I’ve alienated them both, I hope.  Let them talk, I certainly won’t be reading more of their conversations.  Not after her snide remarks to me.  And not after seeing that she doesn’t back her friends up.  He should have been banished from blog land, not given a venue spread his shit around her blog, and have her give it authenticity and validity by publishing his comments, and carrying on flirtatious conversations on a public blog.  I’m not jealous, and honestly don’t care that he comments at all on her blog (I long ago blacklisted him on mine, since he makes really foul comments at times.)  I am just sick of watching her game….thinking she’s playing him, while he’s playing her, and getting what he wants, which is press time for Betty and I to see.

I have a new man in my life, and old Scotty-Boy is a persona-non-grata to me.  She, however, is a big disappointment.  I thought we were friends.  When her alcoholic son kept showing up passed out on her porch, I spent days with her on the phone helping her out, supporting her.  And she thinks that it’s ok to admonish me for talking to Scott, who I really did care for at one point, but then let him into her blog, and carry on what are really private conversations in the comments with him that have nothing to do with her blog, oblivious to the type of man she knows he is.  It’s obvious that she is enjoying his attention, for whatever reason he gives it to her.  Maybe she just likes leading people on, like she led me.

Funny the way things turn out.  I guess it’s for the better.  Got a couple narcissists out of my life this time.  Didn’t think she was, but I’m learning.  Friendship meant nothing to her.  Well, now her so-called friendship means nothing to me.

Now that I have vented this, and put the facts out for the purpose of having the truth on the table, I will let it go, and forget about it. I have a wonderful life here, and I will only look forward.

Love and light.