Feels Good to be Engaged in Life Again

I’ve apparently been on an unplanned sabbatical from WordPress. But I’ve been very busy living. Life seems to be slowly making it’s return to normal, whatever that was, and whatever it will be. For 2 weeks now, we’ve been able to go to the grocery store and not have to wear a mask. I had no idea how freeing it would feel. And to make me feel even freer, I have been able to make short trips there under my own power, meaning I only use the electric carts if I have a lot of shopping to do, but for the short trips I can walk through the store and feel like a normal person. I so appreciate how people want to help me when I’m riding the electric cart, but I so prefer to just be an anonymous shopper. It is wonderful though, to be able to walk without pain. I try to go to the gym 4 or 5 days a week and ride the stationary bike for a half hour. It’s the only thing I can do. I tried the elliptical twice. I used to do it for a half hour, no problem. I have not gotten past 3 minutes on it, and am in pain for a day or two after, so I’m not trying it again for awhile.

I’ve finished the first 3 levels of Kundalini Reiki, which makes me a master, even though there are 6 more levels. I’ve been practicing performing it on a couple people who are friends, and a few people with whom I am acquainted, friendly, but not close friends. I’m doing it for free, and then get their feedback. It’s been remarkable. I told one friend that I sensed there was something going on with her throat chakra, and she instantly remarked, “Oh my throat! It’s sore all the time! I’m always sucking on cough drops.” And then her knee…when I remarked that I felt something was going on with her left knee she told me she hurt it playing pickleball. Of course then she had to explain pickle ball to me.

Everyone I’ve done it for has remarked how my hands start off nice and cool, but quite soon they are very very hot. By the end, I am so hot, I’m almost sweating. This is very normal when performing reiki. The energy we channel comes in through the crown chakra at the top of the head, and travels through my body, where it ends up mostly in my hands as I focus it on the different chakras.

I’d forgotten that happens. It’s a good indicator that I’m performing it correctly, and am channeling the reiki energy.

I’m getting the first of my cataracts removed on July 12. I am so excited. I should have done it a year ago, but I couldn’t walk into the dr. office, let alone sit on one of their chairs for over an hour. But my vision is pathetic now, and I can’t wait to be able to see well again.

I’ve also been reading a lot, voraciously. (The cataracts mainly affect my distance vision.) I think that is because the weather is so nice. I can sit out on the deck all afternoon. There’s usually a breeze coming in off the water. Gulfport is a tiny town, 3 ½ sq. miles, and about half of that is under water. It feels luxurious. A couple of my friends and I are going to start a book club like I had up north, reading only spiritual books. I’m really looking forward to it, as I’ve missed the group of girls that made up our club back in CT.

Today, in fact, I was alone, which was fine. But I was thinking about my BFF up there, who drove down here with me when I moved, and has come down with her husband to visit a few times. I realized how much I missed her, hanging out with her, reminiscing, etc. So, I called her to catch up with her, and we talked for almost 2 hours. It was so wonderful to feel that connection again, with someone who really knows me, someone who went through all the crap with me, and then all the good stuff. Her husband and Dan have become good friends. I remember the first night we stayed with them when I went back to visit. Her husband said if Dan turned out to be an ass he was gonna stay at his boat. And Dan said if her husband turned out to be an idiot, he’d just get a flight back to Florida. But they ended up staying up late, talking, laughing, and now are good friends. It was so good to talk to her. I know her whole family, sister, mother, kids…I miss them all.

Thank God for cell phones, and unlimited minutes.

I’ve also been at Dan’s a lot, to help him as he takes care of his mother, and his brother who was back in the hospital again. He’s home now, but he had pneumonia, sepsis and AFIB. He still requires help, and has a nurse and PT coming in daily. So I’ve just been doing stuff like helping pick up, and grocery shop, etc, trying to make Dan’s life a little easier while he cares for everyone else. I’m so glad that I don’t fall into that category any longer, I’m not one of the people he has to do stuff for. Instead, I am kind of like a respite at the moment, getting him out of the house and watching hockey games with him. It’s all good.

Well, it’s time to head for bed. I just wanted to write this, lest someone think I’ve fallen off the face of the earth. I hope all is well with everyone. Love and light to all.

A Little Stream of Consciousness

I realized today that I need to keep a pen and paper near me. I keep formulating sentences that could start a story, or a poem. I think I’ll remember them, but I don’t. So maybe if I keep a running list of them, I can write something meaningful.

I’m getting my new couch and loveseat tomorrow. My old one is sitting out in front of my house, waiting for the city to pick it up. I don’t tell anyone how it makes me feel to see it out there. In 4 pieces, cast off on the side of the road. I remember how it felt to pick it out, to buy it, to have it delivered to my dream house, and placed in the family room. I loved that couch, so did Bruce. Our old life, pre-divorce, included no nice furniture. Our house was furnished with my ex-in-laws 30 year old furniture from their condo in Boca Raton, before they built their home there. This couch, and my bedroom set, were chosen by me, and Bruce, and we loved that couch. The bedroom set, of course, was mine…he had no say in it, nor did he want any. But I released most of the attachment to that couch before Dan managed to get it out my front door and, flipping it end over end, set it on the street. I need the new couch and loveseat. It will allow us to both (Dan and I) sit in a recliner facing TV to watch it. I am very excited and happy about it. I know my things have way too much importance to me, but I guess that comes from a lifetime of never feeling anything was mine when I lived with his father. Tomorrow begins a new era.

It will enable me to do private sound healing in my home. And who knows what else? I’m thinking of a reiki healing circle, it would help to get my name out in that circle in Gulfport.

I’m sitting on the deck, sipping a glass of wine. I have not done that for ages, at least, not by myself. Today was a magical Florida day. It’s dry (for here, 42% humidity) and 80°which is my favorite temp. My air conditioning has been off since last night. As I sit here, I watch the mockingbirds flit around the trees, and I keep seeing butterflies, which seems to be perfect. I feel I’m at a transformational point in my life, with new furniture, which makes me laugh, but the way it will open up my life is perhaps transformational. We will see.

The geckos are tearing around the deck. There are some big ones now, maybe 4-5” from head to tip of the tail. At any given moment there are 3-6 of them running around my deck. If I venture down the two steps to my grill, a dozen or more may scatter in front of me. Everyone here loves them, they eat bugs, and are so harmless. They are cute. Ellena, my granddaughter, gave them all names last year. They were named by size, small, medium and large.

The wine I’m drinking, a Josh cabernet, is warming my insides.

I’ve found that the house next door is an AirBmB. That could come in handy if I have more than a couple friends come to visit. It’s literally 25’ from my house, so would just be an extension of my house.

The breeze is so light today, it’s lovely. There are Ibis in the empty lot next door, with their long beaks in the long grass, and oblivious to me stopping to observe them. I wonder why the mocking bird is Florida’s state bird, when we have such beautiful sea birds here. Ibis, Egret, Heron. Plentiful, everywhere you look. Even little sandpipers, when you are near the water, and seagulls, and some strange looking ducks.

I’ve been trying to get closer to one of my best friends from up north. She seems to be competing with me for something, I don’t know what or why. I inch closer and she says, “Oh I think we’ll be seeing more of each other…” And then the next day she is cold. Idk. I leave her alone when she gets like that but I feel bad, I miss her. We have always been close, we’ve been friends for almost 25 years, since our boys were in kindergarten together. When I first planned to move here, she said she would be here first, as soon as they could come. 5 years later, she has not been here.

I’m thinking of a girls weekend, well, maybe longer than a weekend, utilizing the house next door and having all the girls from up north that I have always been close to (including the aforementioned friend). I could host up to a half dozen of these friends between the two houses and it would be so much fun to hang out down here with these gals. They could meet my friends down here, I bet they’d all get along really well.

So this is really stream of consciousness today. It’s almost 6 PM and the sun is hanging low in the sky, yet I am loathe to go inside It is peaceful here this evening, even though I can hear cars on the main thoroughfare a couple of blocs down. The neighbor’s windchime is clanking away, and the butterflies are still flitting around. I hope Dan and I can go to the beach next week. Even at times where not everything is lined up the way I want, I still feel like I live in paradise.

Love and light to all.

Enter: My 70’s

It’s my birthday today. A big one…the 70. Suddenly I realize I’m leaving middle age, and becoming elderly. I’m not exactly happy about this one. In fact, I might be slightly depressed, though I am loathe to admit it. I don’t get depressed, that’s my mantra. Depression doesn’t happen to me.

Bullshit.

I look at my sixties. They started with my divorce finally being final the day before my 60th birthday. It was a wonderful decade for me. With the finality of the divorce I had the money to buy my dream home, and lived there for 5 happy years with my son. Then at 65 I sold that house and moved here, to Florida. I retired, I am happy here, I have many friends here and a nice life.

Now as 70 begins, I am alone in my little house, and it is my son who starts this decade out, in a new home, 2000 miles away from me. I miss him terribly. The last year of my 60’s, 2020, was a hard one for all of us. It was hard for me because of the injury that kept me in dire pain all year, prevented me from walking and helped me gain weight, and kept me from losing that same weight because my mobility was so limited. It’s still fairly limited, though it’s better. I miss taking long walks. I miss going to the beach. I miss so many things that used to be just part of life.

I know….be grateful for what you do have. I am, I am. I went to my writers group meeting yesterday and my BFF here performed a one woman play that she wrote, and acted, and she was fabulous. She can really act. I feel honored that we are BFF’s. She is so creative she inspires me not to give a shit what others think, but do what makes me happy.

Trouble is, I don’t know today what that is.

I have an idea, but not one I can publish. I am working through it in my head. I’m trying to make sense of something that seems non-sensical, which is something I have done much of my life, and is now habitual, with my ex. I wanted my marriage to work out, so I made excuses, and didn’t trust my gut. I seem to fall into that pattern. Today, I guess I will accept and be happy about what I have. I mean otherwise, I’ll spend the day unhappy, trying to second guess myself, and where I’m at, and not trusting my gut or seeing anything with the clarity that I’m used to.

So what I guess I need to do is go to gratitude, and stop thinking about what could be, what I don’t know to be true. That’s a waste of more time.

I’m getting my new couch and loveseat on Friday. I’m so happy about that, and I say to myself, “See? You are so blessed to be able to buy them.” And yes I am, and I thank the powers that be for the stimulus checks that made it so much easier to do this. My 10 year old sectional was in terrible shape with broken sections. Once the new couch and loveseat are here, I will be able to do things in the house, like sound healing, and reiki, maybe even a reiki circle to broaden my sphere in that modality.

I’m embarrassed for anyone to see the old one, except good friends who have been here and watched the demise of my current sectional. I have to explain to new friends where they can sit and where they can’t. So the delivery of the new ones will be for much more than comfort and appearance. I will be able to have people come here for whatever reason and not be embarrassed by my broken-down couch, and know people can be comfortable as I (or Dan and I) perform private sound healings, or I host a healing circle, or whatever.

So there’s one thing.

Dan is taking me out to dinner tonight, and we’ll be going somewhere nice, and I’m happy about that. There’s a second thing. Though I’d enjoy it more if I hadn’t sat around for a year, unable to move and so putting on weight. Tonight though, I’ll let it go and try to enjoy the meal, and not feel guilty with every mouthful I chew.

I have a plan to change that. I have pretty much committed to myself that I’m going to a local gym tomorrow, and join since it’s free with silver sneakers. I want to go at least 4 times a week, and use the stationary bike and the elliptical to try to strengthen my hip and thigh more. My left leg still is weak, I cannot climb stairs normally yet. Going up stairs requires one at a time, so I can lead with my right leg. My left leg will not lift me up onto the next step. But I have accomplished going down normally so that’s progress, right?

After the soundbath last Monday it took me about 3 days to recover. My hip and lower back were very sore, because I walked about 2 ½ miles just loading and unloading the truck, then walking around the sound healing. Of course I wasn’t thinking about it while I was doing it, but when I got home and rested, I was in some pain. I thought, “You just have to work harder at getting strong.” And so…I HAVE to go to the gym, and work my legs out, and get my back stronger.

I’m grateful that I know what I have to do, and should be grateful for the opportunity and ability to go do it. But honest to God, I am so sick of that injury running my life. Yesterday at my BFF’s play I couldn’t stand with the other women and talk for long, I just had to sit down. I’m sick to death of having to think about that, and feel it. I just want to be normal. So…tomorrow I’ll start to work at it harder than I’ve been.

But I’m so grateful for that wonderful circle of friends. I’m grateful for so much. Just, right now, I have things I’m not so grateful for, or wish were different, and I’m not living in the present moment if I’m thinking about what I wish was different, am I? And I’m making myself responsible for things not in my control because I want things to be different. Which I know is stupid, but now I have to talk myself out of these thoughts. Meditate. Self-reiki. Play my gong.

Every time I type something, I realize a little more how fortunate I am. I guess I’m on the way.

The other night I updated my will, and POA, and living will. I figure I have 10-15 years left on this earth, and want to leave my son something. In particular, I don’t want to leave him a mess that will take ages in probate for him to deal with.

That ending bracket on my life is looming as I hit the 70 year old mark today. No longer a third, or even a quarter of my life left. Time to thin things out, to simplify things. Things, and sometimes people. Well, honestly, I can’t think of any people who are in my life that I don’t want there. So maybe I’ll just begin thinning things, leave my comfortable, close circle of friends as it is, a safe place for me to go. As is my family. I am so blessed to have my two sisters, and that all three of us love each other dearly.

I should probably get one of those books that try to teach us how to let go of things. Because all of my things have meaning to me, I love looking around and seeing them, they are of comfort to me.

I have heard it said to hold each thing, and see what you feel from it. Everything I have, almost, I can remember exactly where it came from, and what I was feeling. It is almost ALL post divorce, almost all from the last 10-15 years of my life. The 40 years before that very blurred by the trauma of living with a mentally ill husband. Blurred in the sense that every good memory from that marriage has a terrible one to counter-balance it. I’ve disassociated myself from that time in my life and now I can observe with the clarity of distance. I try not to remember how I felt all those years. I try to walk away from all the fear, and heartache those 40 years brought me.

I’m not trying to bury those emotions. I’m just trying to live now, in the present, grateful for what I have, and find a way to really live these last years of my life. Live, with some wild abandon. Surprise myself. Bring a smile to my own face, not wait for anyone to put one there. (Although, it would be a wonderful thing, to have someone want to make me smile….)

Thank you for bearing with me on this retrospective, introspective today. Love and light to all.

Sound Healing Was Great!

The sound healing at the beach went really well.

We had somewhere around 100 people. They were really spread out so we didn’t try to count them. People who came together, sat together, but all the groups were more than socially distanced, mostly more than 10’ apart. Many people wore masks as they approached but took them off once they got settled, which was fine, considering they were socially distanced, we were outdoors, no one is even talking during the soundbath, or singing, or shouting, and the only people walking around at all were Dan and I. Most people go into a pretty deep meditation. I think the risks were pretty low. The social distancing happened organically, as people know what they need to do, and there was plenty of room for people concerned about it to sit a long ways away from any group. I feel that by now, everyone knows what they have to do to be safe, and there was plenty of room to sit 20’ away from anyone else if someone was concerned about being too close to others.

It was a lovely night, an almost cloudless sky as the sun set, filling the sky with rose light. I stood up to thank everyone for coming, and welcome them back to the sound healing at the beach, and as I said that, they broke into applause! That’s never happened before. They did it at the end too!

We were somewhat afraid that the sound wouldn’t carry to the back of the crowd. But as I walked through the crowd with the rainstick, I could hear Dan playing the large gong quietly all the way to the back. Everything is so silent around us while we are playing that the sound easily carried down the beach. The only the sound that accompanied us was the slight breeze and the waves lapping the shore.

I felt it was our best sound healing at the beach, so far. I felt Dan and I were playing intuitively, with each other. We only had to glance at each other to know where we were at, and where we were going next. I absolutely love that feeling, that we can communicate without speaking. Just knowing.

After we finished people were lining up to talk to us. I had a line, Dan had a line. The responses to the soundbath ranged from “That was amazing!” to “I’ve never experienced anything like that before.” to “how long have you been doing this?” and everything in between. It was just so heartwarming, so wonderful to see and hear how much people liked it, and appreciated it, and that it helped them somehow.

I swear I was glowing when it was over. It just delighted me, to be surrouded so many kindred spirits. It was also wonderful to see many people I hadn’t seen in a year, and be able to hug them, because I knew they had been vaccinated, as had Dan and I. I realize there is always going to be some risk, and I won’t hug someone I don’t know. But good friends that are my age or older that I know have been vaccinated? It was wonderful to be able to hug them again.

The tip jar was full to the top, which was wonderful for us, for sure, because it’s a lot of work to load the truck with all our instruments, unload it from the truck at the beach, reload it at the end, bring it home and unload it again. So, my dream of making some money at something I am passionate about came true!

Even though we were finished by 8:30 or 8:45, we didn’t get back to my house until about 10, because so many people wanted to talk to us, and we still had to pack it all up again. At my house (a mile and a half away) we brought in what stays at my house, set it down and plopped down on the couch. It was already past my bedtime! Tuesday I was exhausted all day, but invited a friend over because emotionally I was so pumped that it went so well. She had come to the sound healing and also loved it, and she’s a good friend so didn’t mind me glowing about it, lol.

Love my life here. Feeling totally blessed. Love and light, everyone!

Picture take by me as we began.

How Did I Ever Get Here?

Feeling introspective today.

We have what I’m pretty sure will be our largest attended soundbath tonight. We now have just under 500 responses, 499 to be exact. I keep repeating it to myself, trying to absorb the fact that 500 people were at least interested. Over 60 have committed to coming, but I’m guessing we’ll beat last March’s record. I’ve been trying to figure out how to get people to sit closer to us, so that the back won’t be so far away. I’m afraid those in the back won’t be able to hear it. Even though, I realize that’s something I can’t control, and should just let it go. But I did buy 24 electric tea lights to make some luminaries to delineate to people how close they can get to us, because they always seem to start 20’-25’ feet back from us. Maybe that’s what they want. The luminaries will add atmostphere anyway….

Right now I’m sitting on my deck, just trying to enjoy this incredibly beautiful day. And thinking about how I got here, to this place, this small town in Florida and to be providing something a lot of people seem to like.

15 years ago I was in a miserable marriage with a man who had just gotten crazier over the years, alhough I didn’t recognize it for what it was. I just knew he was abusive of my son and me. It was about 15 years ago, when I’d been married for 30 years, and with him for many more, I knew I had to go, and made my plans. I rented a condo, and eventually, my son made his way to me. It took me 4 years to get fully divorced, and a Supreme Court decision, but once I got it I was able to buy my dream house for my son and me. We lived there for 5 happy, happy years until I craved being retired. That meant I had to sell the house where we were so happy, and move to Florida, where I could afford to retire.

I found the gong baths when I lived in the condo. I had a relationship or two. Thought I was crazy in love once. Turned out I was in crazy denial of all the ways that that relationship was so wrong for me. When I got down here, my ex-husband’s last frail, tenuous thread that connected him to reality broke, irretrievably. It was at that moment, I knew the other thing, the crazy-in-denial thing, had to be over as well, and I closed that door. Clarity through trauma.

Then, as the Universe does when you close the wrong door, Dan walked in the right door. He loves me, and I love him. There is no question. I have, since we met, questioned it, but that was only my fear of being mistreated again, of being abused. I surely didn’t want to set myself up yet again. He is steadfast and strong, holds me up when I need it. And lets me run when I need to do that. But I never run from him, at least not anymore.

He supports me in everything I do. Sound healing, reiki, writers group, having weekly sessions with my girlfriends as COVID raged. And then…there has been my health. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without him in the last year as I was reduced to living in a recliner, unable to walk, in constant pain. For literal months. The better part of a year. He cared for me so tenderly, and I know it was not easy for him. I know he was exhausted from the demands it made on him. But he stayed. He loved me without fail.

Now, here we are. I have learned to let go of any expectations. I have come to understand that I love him, that I want him in my life, that I would not be able to do any of this alone, without his backing. I try to live a life deserving of him.

So many life lessons. I wish I’d started learning them when I was younger. I am so envious of people who actually didn’t have to waste decades of their lives before they were free of the stuff that gets you stuck. But then….age is a number. Time is only the construct of a human, and doesn’t matter. I needed to learn so many lessons, and I think I have learned them. Because tonight I will be doing something that I am so passionate about and loving it. That 500 people here have expressed an interest just blows my mind, but really, it’s not about the numbers. It’s about my opportunity to share a gift with people, to perhaps help many people with their own healing. As the sun sets, as the waves lap the shore, as the new moon darkens the sky and perhaps people look forward, setting intentions to create the life they want, and crave. A life they love.

A friend asked if we could meet early and set some intentions. Dan and I go down early anyway, to set up, to test the sound, to set up my luminaries. But what I did differently for this sound healing was actually write an intention. I will set it out with our singing crystal bowls, with a large piece of amethyst. It says:

The vibrations created by these instruments

and those who play them are for the highest

good of everyone who can hear them, and for

the highest good of the planet.

Which means it will all be for all of you as well. Wishing you love, light and Good Vibrations.

Settling in to Happiness

It’s been thunderstorming since late morning. And that’s after it stormed last night, as soon as I got home from Dan’s. Normally I’d have stayed there last night, not just Friday, but my cataracts are so bad, I didn’t want to drive home in a thunderstorm, or the dark, or more storms today. So I came home early, stopped for gas, and 10 minutes after I got home the corner of my street was flooded from the downpour.

I have an appointment with the opthamologist Wednesday for the first consult on the cataracts. I am so hoping by the middle of May, or even any time in May, that I will be able to see well again. They said I’d just need my readers after surgery. I still have 5 or 6 pairs of readers laying around my house, so I am so looking forward to that. Maybe I’ll be able to read the info on the TV without getting up and walking over to i

We can always dream….

While it stormed today, which is really the first appreciable storm in months, I got most everything packed up for the sound healing tomorrow. Small portable tables, mallets, drums, tip jar, tingsha bells. I washed the gong and washed the little flumies, the small friction mallets that create sounds much like the whales make, although there are people who hear elephants trumpeting, not whale songs. Hey the sounds are whatever you perceive them to be, and the next time you hear them they might be something different. I also washed the singing crystal bowls, because I would guess they are a little dusty from sitting on the table for months. Actually weeks, since we just did a sound healing in March.

It was actually nice to have the whole day to do this. Usually I am rushing around the afternoon before we play, trying to get everything put together. Dan will pack the other two gongs in his truck and all the stands. Then when he comes over here we will pack my gong, the bowls, the drums and the bags I’ve packed, as well as the table for the singing bowls and chairs to sit in when we play. Then drive to the beach, unpack it all, play, then repack it and bring it home. Dan loves to play, but he hates having to haul the stuff around. He bought us a carry bag for all the gongs, and it will be especially nice for his big one, 40”, and it weighs about 60 lbs. The bag should help him. The other two gongs are smaller and not as heavy, but will still be easier to carry from the truck to where we set up with a bag.

I made myself some fish tacos for dinner tonight. They were so good! There’s a place in town down on the beach that makes really good ones, but….it’s raining. Not a good night to sit outdoors drinking wine and eating fish tacos! Later this week, some friends of ours host an open mic there, so maybe we’ll go and get a $4 taco! Tortilla, fish, coleslaw, cheese, and guacamole salsa. Never had them before I started coming down here to visit my sister before I moved here.

My son bought a house out in Colorado. I’m very happy for him, and proud of him. But I’ve had to subdue the emotions I have around it, at least when I’m talking to him. Owning a home means he won’t be packing up and moving here without a lot of planning. That has always been an option…though kind of a distant one. The other emotion I have is that it’s the first really big milestone in his life I’ve not been there to share with him. But….it’s a move he needed to make without me. So….I”ve settled in to just being happy for him.

Here’s to thunderstorms, and sound healing at the beach as the sun sets, getting rid of cataracts, eating fish tacos, and new homes. Life continues flowing merrily along.

Love and light to all.

Sound Healing Response Is Overwhelming!

I have mentioned in a couple of previous blogs that Dan and I are doing another sound healing at the beach here in town. We’ve been pretty excited about it, because it’s been a year and a month since we could play there, because of the COVID shutdown and because of my spinal injury. But we’re going back, and looking very forward to it.

I put up a Facebook event for it. A friend who facilitates drum circles canceled the one she had planned for the same night, at the same place because in her words “You guys have such a huge following.” She said she was lucky to get 8 or 10 people, and she has gotten involved in some other things anyway, and didn’t really have the time. I told her that I HOPED we still had a following but it’s been a year, so we can just hope.

The last time we did this, March of 2020 about a week before the shutdown, our FB event had 225 responses (or somewhere near that, I’m going on my memory) and over 100 people attended. We were thrilled, seriously, just thrilled. This time, our event for Monday night has had almost 450 responses. Since it’s free, (except for what people put in the tip jar) there’s no way to know how many will actually come, but 450 is a HUGE response for any event in this small town.

I’m sure you can imagine I am so excited. To think that there are that many people who would have an interest in this just blows my mind. As you know, or do at least if you read my posts regularly, it is my passion. More than anything, I love hearing peoples stories about the profound impact sound healing has had on them. As it always did for me, always. So I’m really excited and also concerned about the logistics if say, half of those people come. My biggest worry is whether the sound carry to the back of the crowd. So I’m going to try a few things to get the crowd to move up closer to the gongs so that the crowd all move up about 20 ft.

Then tonight I got a FB notification that a page called “St. Pete Homes and Living” had mentioned Good Vibrations Sound Healing. I clicked on the link and turns out they are an online magazine for people looking to buy a home in the area, and they also list all the events in the area for the next week. They had our sound healing listed as something to do Monday night! And I’d never even heard of them! Wow.

Tonight I am so blown away, by the response, and the acknowledgment by this magazine of what we are doing! I don’t know if this is an anomaly, or a trend, or whatever, but it doesn’t really matter. It’s the reality at the moment. It’s all good!

Love and light to everyone.

PS. The “n” key and the “b” key on my keyboard are not wanting to type. I think I got them all put back in, but if you find an error that could use one of those keys, my apologies.

Random Early Morning Ruminations

Good morning peeps. I hope everyone is well this morning. I am reasonably well, for a 70 year old, thought I’d love to understand why I keep waking up at 6 AM, sometimes earlier, when for months I’ve been waking between 7 and 7:30. But it is what it is, right? The sun is coming up, the day is brightening, the long shadows are cast on the ground to the west, and the sun has turned the eastern sky a clear rose gold. There isn’t a cloud in the sky. I can see it’s breezy out, and it’s chilly today, 50°. Chilly for Florida. I set my heat so the house wouldn’t go below 68° last night, and it was a chilly 68° when I finally realized that sleep was over and got out of bed,

I shouldn’t mind the early hours. For years I was up around 5:30 every day, usually writing. So maybe now that my health issues of the last year are so improved, I will go back to the early hours. I do love the sunrise, the promise of another day.

I was alone a lot this week. But yesterday my Wednesdames rescued me (even though it was Thursday), and I walked two houses down to my friends house, and 4 of us chatted and had a glass of wine and a little smoke. My friend made a spinach and feta cheese frittata, and she had made some gluten free cookies with almond flour. They were delicious. It was good to see them and just have a relaxed talk with them.

I asked one of the girls, who writes a LOT, (she wrote a play which was produced off-Broadway some years ago) what her process is. Does she need to be alone, have it quiet, or something else. She said she needs to be alone but needs to be able to walk around while she’s thinking. Interesting. I realized that while my process used to be to write in the early morning hours, that I have not been doing that. Not taking a focused dedicated time for my writing, kind of expecting it to just come out of me. While that does happen occasionally, we all know that it does not happen all the time. I guess I’ve been waiting for it to just hit me, some inspiration or something. I’ve not taken it seriously recently, so I’m hoping that I can find a process that works, incorporating the new with the old. Wondering what process others use.

I was alone out of choice this week. Monday Dan and I had lunch with my sister and brother-in-law at our favorite cuban restaurant in town. But Tuesday and Wednesday I just sat on my deck and read, meditated, did self-reiki, listened to music. Both days I was outside til late in the day, 5 or 5:30. It was so lovely… temps in the low 80’s, only a slight breeze and fairly low humidity (that means it was under 60%). I haven’t spent an afternoon reading in a long time, let alone 2. I’m reading a John Grisham novel, Testament. Totally not my normal choice, but last time I was at Dan’s I forgot to bring my kindle and so picked this up off his bookshelf. And to my surprise, I am really enjoying it. Surprised, because I am so used to reading spiritual-bent books. I used to read a lot of Grisham, and I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed his writing. It was also nice to take a break from the deep kind of stuff I usually read.

I find myself veering off of things I intend to write, to just kind of journal. But I just deleted that portion in this post. Unless I have something deeper to say about it….I don’t want to do that! The other day I wrote a long journal-type entry, and saved it as a journal, not published. That’s what I’m going to continue to do with journal-type entries. Write them, because I obviously need to record them or I wouldn’t write them, but also, I am often working out something personal in them.

It’s interesting to observe myself, how I’ve strayed from writing, because I haven’t felt like focusing. Lazy? Afraid of what I might find out about myself? I don’t know. I do have a renewed interest in performing reiki, which is taking my time and thought. I really enjoyed providing it with my new massage table, for free, to my friends. I’m even considering a course in performing it on pet

s because this is the most pet friendly town ever. Even the drinking fountains down along the beach have a low fountain for dogs. Every outdoor restaurant provides bowls and water to their customers pets. So why not reiki when the pet gets upset, or doesn’t feel well? Well, people first. I need to extend my free offer to some others of my friends.

Time to get this day underway. I spent a good hour here today, writing. Not my best work, but certainly not my worst. Acceptable, for today.

Love and light to everyone.

Catching My Breath

I’m sitting down and catching my breath tonight. I’ve been busy lately, busier than I ever expected to be in my retirement!

We are doing a sound healing at the beach for the April new moon. I’ve been trying to get the word out, mostly on Facebook. I created an event which I first put up a week ago, and have received over 150 responses of going or interested. That’s pretty amazing! I will be re-sposting 2 more times prior to the event at the beach. I have a good feeling about the turnout. We do it for free, but will of course take donations. We haven’t done this in a year, but the last time we had over 100 people and got a lot of tips/donations. So that’s taking a lot of my time, but I’m really looking forward to it.

I have offered my friends here in town a free reiki session, and have done a couple of them. I want to practice in-person reiki, because I’ve done it rarely since I moved to Florida. I do distance reiki regularly for friends, and for Dan to help him sleep, but not in-person. Last week a few of my friends were over and one of them asked me to do it to see if I could help her with an issue, and I was happy to. I haven’t gotten feedback yet. I may not get any unless I ask but I’m sure I will at some point. Another friend has been asking me to for awhile, but I didn’t want to do it at all, for anyone, until my vaccinations, (and theirs) were fully effective. The second time was kind of cool, because I sensed something in her throat chakra, and she immediately confirmed. Like, “Oh yeah, my throat is always sore. I am constantly sucking on cough drops.” But I did not know it until after I treated her, so it was nice to have confirmation that I actually intuited something, and could feel the energy around something that was a real problem for her.

Of course, in order to do reiki in person, I had to learn to put the massage table up and take it down. Down was easy. Up was much more difficult but I think I got it now.

I also finished a couple of crystal reiki courses, and I made a couple of crystal grids. One for my house, one to put under the reiki table that I can customize if I need to. Right now it’s kind of generic, but as I get to know people, clients, better, I will be able to tailor it to their intentions.

I have a couple other courses in the queue on Udemy too. And I just finished Brene Brown’s book, Braving the Wilderness, which was utterly fabulous. As she usually is.

On top of these things, my son is buying a townhouse in Colorado. He’s doing it on his own, it will be solely in his name. I am so proud of him, to be buying this house at age 28. He’s been on the phone with me constantly, asking me so many questions about why the financial people want this, that, and other things. He asked me to come out there for Mother’s Day, because it falls near his birthday, and his girlfriends daughter, but I can’t because I am hoping I’ll be getting my cataracts removed around then. But maybe later in May.

Dan and I both got haircuts, him for the first time since last summer. He goes to the same hairdresser that I do, but has been afraid to go til he was vaccinated because she is an anti-masker, and all that goes with it. But she’s good at cutting hair. I’ve been twice more than he has, but I had to. I had to sleep on my right side for the better part of a year due to all my back/hip/leg problems. As a result, the hair on the right side of my head was all thinned out and broken, and looked so awful! So my hairdresser had to cut it pretty short, so I could let it grow back in a healthier state. I am using better products on it, and not using any heat on it, and sleeping on a satin pillow case. It’s really improved but I will be happy when it’s grown back.

As for that back/hip/leg issue, it’s so much better. I faithfully do the exercises that PT gave me, every day, and I’ve started taking short walks, like to the end of the block and back. It doesn’t seem like much but considering that a couple of months ago it seemed like an impossibility, I’m thrilled.

Then there is regular housework, laundry, grocery shopping (I’m still using the electric cart there because I can’t stay on my feet for the length of the grocery store and check-out). So, writing has gotten pushed to the back burner for me at the moment. But life is full, and good. It feels so good be re-engaging with life again.

Love and light to everyone.