I slept quite well last night, for 7 1/2 hours.  I woke at about 4 AM, and fell back to sleep til 5:30 during which time I had this odd dream.

I was somewhere with Scott, and lots of people were around.  We both wanted to shower, but he told me to take one first. So I did.  After I was finished, and drying off with one of my beach towels (in real life, it was one of my beach towels!) I looked out the window and saw him run up to some woman who was laying on a table, and kiss her.  Then he saw me looking at him, shaking my head, not in a jealous way, but kind of like, an exasperated “you are who you are” way. He then grinned and went on to grab another woman and kiss her as if to prove to me it meant nothing.  Then I dreamed a man I didn’t know was looking in the window, but didn’t see me.  When he left, I closed the curtain the rest of the way. That was it.

So of course, I’m into dreammoods this morning.

Taking a shower:

To dream that you are taking a shower in clear, fresh water symbolizes spiritual or physical renewal and forgiveness. You are washing the burdens out of your life.

Kissing: To see others kissing in your dream suggest that you are too involved in someone else’s personal lives and relationship. You need to give them some space.

That ‘s as close as I could come to seeing your significant other kissing.

Window: To dream that you are looking out the window signifies your outlook on life, your consciousness and your point of view. It also refers to your intuition and awareness. You may be reflecting on a decision. Or the dream is telling you that you need to go out into the larger world and experience life. Consider the significance of the things you see when you look out the window. If  you are looking in the window, then it indicates that you are doing some soul searching and looking within yourself. It is time for some introspection. To see another face in the window in your dream suggests that you are feeling emotionally distant and physically detached.  Also consider the emotion depicted on the face. 

What I am taking from this is…

1. The shower was me cleansing myself of the past, and I really do feel cleansed this morning, renewed. I have forgiven and let go almost all of that relationship. The good, the bad, the ugly. It feels good.
2. Yes, I have been too involved with him still. I need to give him (and myself) the space. I acknowledge that Scott will never be faithful to anyone, completely. That he will take the chance, and then laugh about it, saying he was just flirting. I also now see that the flirting is always, has always, been an attempt to make the woman he was with jealous, because he believes that is love. He also doesn’t believe someone loves him unless they cry over him. I’m done crying……
   
3. I believe I was probably reflecting on some personal decisions, with the windows in the dream. Decisions to let Scott go, to take a chance on a conversation and consider the possibilities with a new man. The man who looked in the window, was maybe looking for me, maybe someone in my future, who hasn’t found me, but will, after all he was at this gathering where I was, but I didn’t know him.

So, another interesting night. I am happy about that dream. I feel set up to make my move to Florida without any straggling emotional ties this morning. It’s good that the more distance I have from him, the clearer I see him, and his motivations, and am able to understand and thus let go of so much. I feel sorry for him, that he has never been able to understand the concept of real love. Not jealousy, just pure unconditional love.

Well, I’ll always love him that way, unconditionally. But I will be gone…I will be off making a new life with someone who wants a more mature, richer, fuller experience with a woman, than feeling her jealousy. He may miss that someday. I bet, in his heart, he misses it now. But I’ll never know.

My life moves on, happily. Onward…..

Love and light, all.