Tough Day

One of my best friends daughter totaled her car today. She broke her collarbone and a couple ribs. She’s 25, a registered nurse. Probably on her way to work or home. If you looked at the car you’d think she never lived through it. Drivers side of the car completely smashed in. I can’t reach my friend, I don’t know if the daughter is still in the hospital or home. My friend is also a nurse, her other daughter is a PA, (physician’s assistant). So if she’s home, she’s in good care. But I wish I could reach my friend. She must be losing it.

I remember when my son totaled his car. He was 18, and totaled 2 cars, his and the other one. He walked out of it with a broken ankle. I was a basket case.  The investigating state cop told us that he’s never seen that much damage where someone didn’t die.  Just to add to the stress and tension, it was 4 days before I had to go to Supreme Court with his father, and we had to sit together in the damn hospital emergency room.) I lost my car in the hospital parking garage when I went to take him home. Such a mess.

I did that again, when Scott first told me Betty Boop was back in his life. Which he then denied, very convincingly, and then told me she was again, 2 weeks later. I guess that’s how I deal with stress. Lose my car in a parking garage. Now I take a picture of the level marker. Level E, Deb, not Level H.

Geezus. I hope I don’t do it again in the next few weeks. An awful lot going on, though it’s not traumatic, not terrifying. Except leaving my son in Denver, that will be traumatic. I can’t even think about it without crying. Even though I know he’ll be ok. Just a mom thing I guess.

Work was stressful today. Really bad. I hope tomorrow is easier. Just spreading myself way too thin between the two people. I came home with a headache, and that almost never happens to me. About half way home, I started to realize I wasn’t really breathing, and that I was so tense, the energy around me was thick with strain and stress. So I made a conscious effort to breathe. To acknowledge that I was now out of work, was here and now, and perfectly ok.

Then I went out to eat with my cousin, who bought me dinner. That was really nice. I wasn’t going to drink but decided to have glass of wine.

I think it’s time to call it a day. Go read some Jitterbug Perfume. Sleep will be welcome.

Love and light.

3 responses to “Tough Day

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