Do you ever have so much to say, and know you should just keep your mouth shut, so you don’t start WWIII?? That’s me, right now. All day. I’ve been a simmering pot, which is on the verge of boiling over. So I’m here, letting off a little more steam, trying to keep the mess to a minimum as I deal with a whole bunch of crap.
I have so much I’d like to say about the lie and the liar who told it to me last night. Unwittingly, because the liar forgot that lie had already been told to me once, and tried to lie about it again. Like, really? Didn’t that happen oh, 18 months ago? No?????? Oh well, you said it did. You actually confirmed it on two separate occasions. And now, you have lied so much to so many people, you can’t remember that you already used that one on me. So which one was a lie? I think the 18 months ago… Not the one last night.
There is smoke fuming out of my nose. And my ears, and my mouth and my eyes. There is a volcano bubbling up and I’m gonna have to find some external method to stop it from bubbling over. Anger is slow to rise with me, then it sets on fire, then it subsides, all pretty quickly. Usually. In this case, it may take awhile.
Maybe because before the lie, earlier in the day, I’d been informed there was a shopping spree on, and I might get chosen for a test ride, mabye even purchased, like what a cool thing that would be!! Wouldn’t anyone love to think of themselves as a product on a shelf for someone else’s enjoyment? As if I was lucky enough to be in the running for the final choice? Yeah…..I was already pretty pissed off about that. Really really pissed off.
Some people are just depraved. Really. I turned a blind eye to it, made excuses for it, for way way too long. But really, how can I continue being deaf, dumb and blind to that kind of sickness when it creeps into my life over and over, in different disguises but the delivery person is always the same one? I can’t, I just can’t. I have to sweep it from my life, from my psyche for one last time. I have no words left to describe what I think of an individual who can actually do and think this kind of stuff, and actually justify it in their sick head. I think it will be easy this time, to keep the house of my psyche clean, as soon as my anger subsides. Writing this out helped.
We have to purge our lives of people who only bring us lies and pain. We do not need to ho back again only to see and confirm what such a person is capable of. I know how easy it is to get thinking that “maybe they weren’t THAT bad”, so you will have another look see, and they arem… worse than you even remembered…. brrr. Escape. You go girl! π
Yep. Escape. Freedom. It’s so f’d up it’s incomprehensible. It’s beyond just narcissism. It’s sick. Really sick. Thanks fir the support. My blood pressure is heading back down. Lol.
Nice one Deb. you really should write that person a thank you note!! thanking that person for an action and lie so depraved that it has set you free!!
Trying to do a little So Hun and get my BP back to normal. Lol. Big Gus M. π
I admire your purging because I don’t to enough of it, having a long history of being too nice, so this could inspire me next time I need to get things out. It seems to be working well!
I don’t know if it’s a good thing or not, but I do know that it’s the only way I’ve found that allows me to release it to the universe and let it go. I used to be much uglier when I did it, lol. Now I want to purge, but actually write as well as I can while I do it. But yeah, purge away if you need to. Even if you don’t publish it, it is so helpful. Big hugs!
Thanks! Big hugs π