I talked to the therapist this morning. One thing she suggested was that I get to an Al-Anon meeting. And truth be told, lots of people have suggested it. I found one that’s not too far from me on Thursday and I may go. Not sure how much good it will do me, but I’m guessing it’s worth a try.
I’ve been still dealing with my ex on the perimeter. Today I got another email from an old neighbor, giving me some information, which I should pass along to the social worker and psychiatrist at the hospital. It feels unfair that I am the one having to deal with these issues, but it is what it is. Marianne Williamson said in The Return to Love that a relationship doesn’t end just because the two people are not physically together. Although this was not news to me, I am seeing first hand how utterly true it is in ways we never expect. I always had that relationship with S, that we communicated in other ways when we were not talking for months at a time. I never had it with my ex, but here it is.
I realized today that none of the events of last weekend are things I’ll “get over” and forget about. I’ll adjust, like when you lose a loved one. I’ll get used to them. I won’t “get over” any of it. There are lessons to be learned, and I’ll just have to follow them to their natural conclusions and see what sifts out to be a life lesson.
I really would, Universe, appreciate some lessons that are not so hard. I’m so ready for easy. I suppose that’s not how it works. I suppose each lesson learned sets you up to deal with a harder and more complex lesson next. But ugh. I am ready for summer vacation, you know?
Onward. Love and light, all.