Is it just me?
I took my childhood friend to a dr. appt. today. Not a big deal, I had told her I would because she has no car. The appointment was for 3:30. I told her I had a dinner date after that, but since I should have her back home by 5 after the appointment, that it was all good.
When I picked her up and she got in the car she said told me she also needed to make a stop at Walmart. It would only take 10 minutes. I reluctantly agreed, because she doesn’t have a car, and she needed to send a moneygram somewhere. Shouldn’t she have asked me if it was ok? Instead of just said she needed to stop there? I got her to Walmart at 4:30, expected her out at 4:45, but she didn’t come out til like 5:10 with a cart with about 4 or 5 bags of groceries. She’d decided to go grocery shopping too while she was there. Again, is it just me, or shouldn’t she have told me she needed to do some shopping too, and maybe asked if there was time, since she knew I had plans? And, when she comes back she’s drags some guy to the car with her to see if we have time for him to fill out paperwork to give her a free phone. (An Obama phone, she called it. Free for those who are on food stamps, which apparently she is, which I didn’t know til today.” I said, “I’m already running late.” Because I still had to take her home 15 or 20 minutes away.
I dropped her off at her house at 5:25, and left, a half hour late.
I was a little angry. I tried not to be. I can’t imagine what it must be like to reach retirement age and have nothing, not 2 nickels to rub together. But still, I don’t think being broke is a good reason to disrespect my time and efforts.
Not to mention, I’ve now driven 15 miles and 2 hours of my time without even the thought of giving me gas money or anything. And this is not the first time. I’ve spent probably 3 or 4 full days since her car died driving her around. But now, I’m kind of feeling like I’ve become her ride, like dial-a-ride or something.
Ok, rant over. It’s not a huge deal, but I guess I thought she was a better friend than that.
On the bright side, my dinner date was awesome.
Small irritations. I guess I should just be grateful for all my blessings, which are many.
Love and light.
It’s not just you. Most people would know that this is disrespectful and not at all okay. But some people need things spelled out with very clear boundaries. Glad your dinner date was awesome. 🙂
I suppose it must be so depressing not to have youor own car and have to depend on someone else. Might cause you to not be thinking correctly.
The date brought me flowers on another date, and this time gave me a box of chocolates for Mothers Day. So sweet. Opens the doors for me, walks on the outside when we are walking down the street. Totally not used to someone who makes it all about me. Refreshing.
You already know what I think. 😜
I think you need to set boundaries. And only take her one place when agreed. Or only agree when you have no other plans. She’s not using you if you choose to be a part of it. She needs help. I have cried and been hurt regarding friends who need help right now. And yet I also expect that they will have to fit into my world where I choose them too. Oy. Its hard. But if you start giving her your time…. As opposed to her stealing it. …. Your relationship may be saved e
Exactly. I’ve helped her a lot and will continue to. Just her disrespect of my time irritated me. That was the lesson for me, for next time is to ask her up front where else she has to go and then only take her those places. Our relationship will still be, we’ve been friends for 50 years. It was an anomaly I think but it won’t happen again.
Sorry, I meant to make this comment way sooner: totally not just you. Very inappropriate.