Surrendering

Tonight I am beat. Dan has to be more tired than me. But we are ready. He boarded up the 7 windows which were not replaced with hurricane windows, and reinforced my front door. I helped where I could, got things ready for his family, put away all the deck furniture, made a pot roast in the slow cooker.

We are both emotionally drained by this ordeal. Last night we were up half the night with the change in forecast, and now we are ready. Yeah, ready for bed.

It’s terribly taxing to live under this kind of threat every day. You hope for the best. You have to acquiesce that you may get the worst. And there is basically nothing else going on in your life until it’s over. Everyone you talk to wants to know if you’re staying (“Why are you staying? Get out of there now!”) or evacuating (“Where are you going?”). And then you have to tell the story over and over again. You go numb, or get anxious with the retelling of how you made the decision to stay.

But there’s no reason to leave. My house is as safe as anywhere, and I’m not worried about staying here. At least, no more worried than if I was any other place in FL, and much less comfortable if I was in a shelter or someone else’s home. I have surrendered to the outcome, whatever it will be.

It’s interesting to have the “in-laws”, or I guess they are out-laws here. They all love to talk, and it’s often noisy. A challenge for someone who lived alone for 10 years. Well, my son was there, but he had his own space and only spent minutes a day talking incessantly to me. But it’s fun, and I’m grateful for the opportunity to take care of them in this crazy circumstance.

Love and light everyone.

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