Strange Days

Strange, as defined by Google: 1. unusual or surprising in a way that is unsettling or hard to understand. 2. not previously visited, seen, or encountered; unfamiliar or alien.

What strange times are these.

We are required by international consensus, to stay home, to avoid crowds, to “socially distance” ourselves from others, to be fastidious. Is this not good advice in all times?

I went to the grocery store yesterday with Dan, to see what we COULD buy. We are lucky in this country, at least for the time being. We can buy pretty much anything we want to eat. We cannot buy disinfectants, at least not now. Or paper products. I think I have enough of what we can’t buy to last until this crisis is over. I made my own hand sanitizer from aloe and isopropyl alcohol, because I can’t find any hand sanitizer. I have bleach. But honestly, since I am not really going anywhere for a while, I don’t expect to need it at home. The store was uncharacteristically quiet for a Sunday, during peak tourist/snowbird season. There were parking spots available which is totally weird for a Sunday. Was it my imagination that people were quieter, treating each other more kindly?

Dan ordered toilet paper from Sam’s. He got a notice from UPS that it would be delivered Wednesday. This morning there is an email from Sam’s saying the order was canceled. But I’m pretty sure that if UPS says it has a package weighing 27 lbs, and a tracking number, and nothing else has been ordered that could weigh that much, that it’s going to come. Yes, I know 27 lbs is heavy for just TP. He ordered two large packs, a total of 55 or 60 rolls, to share between himself and me, his brother and his mother. Not really an excessive amount for 4 people. I’ll let you know if it comes or not.

I came home from his house yesterday, and sat out on my deck, reading and enjoying the gorgeous weather. It was almost surreal out there. So beautiful. So peaceful, even though I live in a densely populated area, there was very little noise. Not even many cars on the street. Two young sisters visiting next door were finding all the good hiding places in the yard, playing together so sweetly, cooperating with each other, laughing, smiling. Their young mother looked over at me and smiled, she looked very content, happy, maybe even joyful. Birds were singing, the breeze was blowing. It felt luxurious. Weird, in the midst of all the angst we are reading and hearing about, to feel like I’d been given a gift.

Time to be still, not just for the 15 or 20 minutes of meditation each day which is my normal practice. But all the time, at least in our minds. An opportunity to discover how to quiet our minds from all the worry, as we realize we have no control except to stay home. Make use of the time, soon enough the insanity of daily living will return.

Although, maybe it won’t. Maybe collectively we are slowing the pace of life, maybe many people will realize they like being home more, being with just family and close close friends, not worrying about what might be, or may never be. Just living, staying in the moment. Because it’s all we can do. And it’s the best thing we can do.

I’m not sure that this virus is not intentional on the part of the universe. I believe the universe conspires on our behalf all the time, and that it’s not capable of not loving us. Looked at through that lens, perhaps its what we all needed: to be forced to stay home, to stay still, to have time to think about how and what we do and say, and what energy we are putting out. To realize what;s really important in our lives.

Maybe. Maybe not. I kind of think it’s one of those things we can choose….to see it as a gift, or a curse. Pollyanna that I am, I see it as a gift. Because I choose to.

I hope everyone is healthy and enjoying this little break in our lives. For those who are not, I send you loving and healing light in the hopes that you are soon free of whatever it is that ails you.

Love and healing light to all.

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