Not Yet (A Poem)

flower

Her heart is singing
Sweet melancholy.
Aching tenderly.

A haunting melody
Carried on the morning breeze
Loss and gain
Love and sorrow
The journey continues.

Hoping to be heard
She looks to the sun
Seeking the comfort she gave away,
The direction for her footsteps.
Looking for the joy
She is sure will come.
But afraid, it may not.

Still missing the pieces that were lost
And fearful for the fragile ones
Hanging by gossamer threads from her soul.
She’s hoping to find starlight on the way
Sparkling shards that will give her breath shape
Into a formless solid.

She fears she will not find them.
She fears she will lose more.
Yet, she continues.
The journey beckons
Relentlessly,
Giving her no choice
but to sing the song,
Hoping it is heard.

Her heart steps
Tentatively
into the day.

What can she know?

Only that she can love
And once did.
Only that her child
Is the miracle of her life.
Only that the love will stay
If she allows it to.

Still, tears form in the recesses.
A longing for something tangible
To hold onto
To grasp in the night
When the new moon casts darkness.
An ache, making a beautiful song
Love, not fulfilled
Yet.

By Deborah E. Dayen

Picture from Google Images

14 responses to “Not Yet (A Poem)

      • I am trying to be patient and just let what is meant to happen, happen but it is hard, sometimes I am really excited about the possibility of really finding that one special man and other times I am terrified to try again and when I have, it just brings me back to him again and I just can’t… oh well, just have to work on letting things happen and stop projecting, but it is hard, very hard. you are such a help my friend, such a huge help… thank you. xox

        • I think we need to really let go first, before we can let someone else in. But I do think that letting them go, opens the space for the man who can really offer something to come in. Really believe that, for you and for me. I am getting pretty good at reconciling what is with what I thought was. Just takes time. I’m a little ahead of you on the timeline of getting past so many lies.

          • you are right, just really had to do some days and others it is easy, hoping the easy days out number the hard ones soon. I really does take a lot of time to get past the lies… I have to stop trying to figure out the why of it all and just let go…soon, I hope, very soon

            • It’s his defect, not yours. At the end of the day, you can (and will!!) move on, but he can’t run from who he is. And obviously can’t change. S has my love, and my pity, but not my desire any longer. I just find it easier that way, not saying it’s for everyone. I can’t imagine wanting a fake life, full of lies and deceit at this age. You’d think they’d be sick of it. Whatever. Big hugs…

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