Learning to Lean The Other Way

A nice thing happened last night. I hadn’t heard from L all day, but I knew he was driving to meet his friends, and when he did would be all caught up in their doings, having fun, so didn’t expect to. On Sunday I had asked him to send me a picture of himself, a selfie, because he’d taken down all his pics on the dating site, so I didn’t have any. I jokingly said, “I don’t want to forget what you look like.” He replied that “you are so sweet! But I am not good about selfies.” So I said, “well, maybe one of your friends can take one and you can send it to me.”

Last night going to bed, I was just thinking about him, wondering where he was, because they had a few places on their itinerary, and hoping really, that he was having a great time. And I heard the text alert go off, and he sent me a pic his friend had taken of him at the finish line on the Daytona track. It’s from a distance, but I was able to zoom in enough to see him well. He said, “Does this qualify as a selfie?”

It was just so nice, not just the picture but the fact that at the end of the day, he remembered my request and cared enough to honor it. Wow. I may have a keeper here. He actually knows how, and seems to want to, build a relationship.

It’s still so new, too new to tell if it will go anywhere or not, but clearly, the foundation is being built one brick at a time. And not being torn down in between, nor is anything being withheld in some kind of power play. No game, at all.

It’s so refreshing. I have gotten so used to leaning into the discomfort of a relationship. Now I am leaning into the joy of it. Which is actually a little scary, lol. I am trained to expect the rug to get pulled out from under me, to wait for the other shoe to drop. But every day, I am less afraid of that, and more willing to believe in the possibilities.

Love and light….

6 responses to “Learning to Lean The Other Way

  1. Ahhhh, this makes me sooooo happy! You and Survived are my old friends here in Blogland, and to see you both flourishing and happy makes me feel warm & happy too!

    We get so used to accepting less and less and eventually question our own sanity. To find a man who’s open, consistent, calm *and* comes with no drama must be quite unnerving at first. But as I said to Survived earlier, you’ve got the boundaries in place, you’ll pay attention to your inner voice if it starts the red flag alerts…..and in the meantime, enjoy every second!

    Sending you lots of love! ❤ ❤ x

  2. Here it is, Deb:

    “I am trained to expect the rug to get pulled out from under me, to wait for the other shoe to drop. But every day, I am less afraid of that, and more willing to believe in the possibilities.”

    How beautiful is this revelation? Peace to you on your journey. Be it all you need it to be.

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