SoCS: What’s Precious?

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This post is a response to the Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS) prompt by Linda G. Hill.  The prompt this week is the word “precious”.  If you’d like to try this prompt please go to her page at https://lindaghill.com/2018/10/12/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-13-18/   for all the rules.  Enjoy!   The first thought I had with this week’s SoCS prompt was a … Continue reading

SoCS: As Far As I Can See

This post is my contribution to the Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt of “so far”.  

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So far, my life in Florida has been all I hoped it would be. I left old things, relationships, taxes and a job that were no longer going serve me well, (or never did, lol) and found new things, places, weather, (except for the hurricanes) and a relationship that makes my heart sing. So far, the only things I miss about my life in New England are my son and my friends.

Yep, I’ve come so far, in a short 18 months. Every day is an adventure, kind of. We wake up and decide what we are going to do for the day over coffee. Today is cloudy but a nice 65°. We decided to go for a walk. We found a nice lot of land for sale. We’ve been toying with the idea of building a house together. So far, that’s all we’re doing, just learning about the market here. It’s into the future quite a ways, because we’d have to sell both our houses.

On the walk, we walked by a marine business that we drive by all the time, since it’s close to my house. There was a fishing boat on a trailer in the front driveway. It was about 50’ long. The business is owned by one of the premier charter fishing companies in the area. This boat was very narrow, only about 8’, which is super narrow for a boat that long. One of the guys came out and talked to us. He told us that this particular boat runs out 135 miles off shore, fishes for about 6 or 7 hours and runs back in. In one day. That is SO FAR to go for a day trip! But I know Dan would love to go, because they go fish in the deep water, and catch fish that most people don’t have a chance to catch. 40 lb grouper, tuna, and lots more. The guy told us the boat charters for about $3000 for 6 people, so it would be about $500 per person just to get on the boat, then you have your equipment rental (unless you happen to have fishing tackle for 50 lb fish) and tipping the guide, etc. So closer to $600 for the day. It would be the fishing trip of a life time though.

I would consider going with him on a charter that doesn’t go out so far. There’s one that goes out about 70 miles, it’s a high-speed catamaran, and holds more people so the cost gets down to about $300 per person. Not that I’m crazy about fishing, though it is fun. But I’d love to spend the day on the boat, on a beautiful Florida day, on the calm waters of the Gulf of Mexico. Well, somewhat calm. It’s not that I’m bothered by going so far off shore. Once you’re out of sight of land you are out of sight of land and that happens in 10 to 15 miles. It’s just that I can’t justify the $600 or $700 it would cost me. I don’t like to fish enough to pay that much. Even $300 is a real stretch. I wonder if I can pay less, like $100 just to take the ride and not fish?

Dan and I talk about getting a boat, a smaller boat, like 25’ to 30’. It’s another thing that might be in the future for us. We’d both like to have a small cabin so we could stay out for a night or two.

There are lot of new plans with this new life. The days are full, and rich, and drama-free, even if we’re doing nothing but sitting on the beach, sipping tropical drinks. Or home, just working around the house, or cooking a good meal, or even just watching TV.

As far as I can see into the future, it’s a good life, so far!

 

If you’d like to participate in the SoCS prompt, please go to Linda G. Hill’s blog, for all the details.  Here is the link.  https://lindaghill.com/2018/03/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-10-18/   Have fun!!

 

 

SoCS: Saved, and Safe

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Back when I was going through my divorce, and my son was living with his father, and I was terrified for him, and was facing an epic battle to save my son, the song The Prayer came across my view and I adopted it as my anthem for that dark period of my life. It was the following lines that I related to so well:

 

Lead us to a place,

Guide us with you grace,

To a place where we’ll be safe.

 

Fast forward to the present time. After a few detours and mis-turns, I have gotten to a place that is safe. It came on gradually, but the cumulative result is that I wake up happy every day. I no longer feel dread faced with a new day. I love my life. My son also is safe, and a new and happy life for himself. My ex….well, he’s in a place that’s safe and where my son and I are safe from him, though I could not save his life.

The other day I ran across this Mary Oliver poem, The Journey. It speaks so eloquently of the difficult task ahead of us when we leave an abusive, or even just bad relationship, or situation. I thought I’d share it for those who haven’t run across it. I hope you all enjoy it, and that you’re all safe.

Love and light, all.

The journey

 

This post is written for Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday writing prompt.  If you would like to join in the fun, please go to her page https://lindaghill.com/2017/10/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-717/  for all the rules.

SoCS Writing Prompt: I Guess

Guessing is not something that I’m good at. I can’t guess the lottery numbers, and I can’t guess what someone who is silent is thinking. I can’t guess how many marbles fill the jar, and I can’t guess how many spilled out.

I can’t guess what was on the mind of the white supremecists in Charlottesville today, and I can’t guess why some fool wanted to mow down the protesters with his car. But then again, can’t I?

I guess, uneducatedly, that if someone wants or attempted to mow down some protestors that he disagreed with them. I guess, that he comes from a place of fear of himself, of shame, and wants to mow down anyone who makes him look at himself for what he is. How dare anyone stand against his desire to blame all people but those who look like him for all the ills he’s brought on himself. His belief that his over-inflated white ego is worth more than anyone else’s?

Geezus. Maybe I’m better at guessing than I thought.

I guess that if someone does something like that, like drive into a crowd of people protesting the hate and violence espoused by the KKK, the Nazi’s, the White Supremecists, the David Dukes of the world, they probably align themselves with that hateful school of thought.

But I still guess that love conquers hate, that only light can dispel the darkness, and I will continue to try to overpower the hate, and fear, of these sad human beings (and I use the term loosely) with love. In the words of Dr. Martin Luther King, “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too big a burden to bear.”

Remember this, when at the end of your day you want to hate these people. Hate what they do, but pray for them, that they can find a different path out of their darkness. A path different than mowing down innocent bystanders. A path different than separation from the rest of the human race.

I guess some will disagree with me. I guess I don’t care. Love is the only answer that really changes anything, and the only answer that lifts anything. So, I’ll stick with it, and at the end of the day, be at peace with it.

I guess.

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This post was written as part of the SoCS writing prompt of Linda G. Hill.  If you want to join the fun, please go to her page at https://lindaghill.com/2017/08/11/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-1217/  and get all the rules about this prompt!

SoCS: Admit

This post is submitted as part of the SoCS (Stream of Consciousness Saturday) prompt by Linda G. Hill.  She offers the prompt every Friday for publication Saturday.  If you’d like to join in, please visit her site, https://lindaghill.com/2017/06/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-1017/  for the complete rules.

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ADMIT

I admit that this writing prompt is a little difficult. I can see coming at it from too many angles, and I want to choose only one. I think the one I choose will be this. To admit something is to become accountable for it.

If I admit that I have lied, I become accountable for the lie, and the repercussions of the lie. Admitting it and then not recognizing how it ripples out in this world is not being accountable. If someone lies, and can admit it, but not even try to repair the damage done, then the admitting of the lie is simply a self serving tool to say to themselves that they acknowledged it. But it does the world no good for the lie to be admitted, but leave the damage unrepaired.

Sometimes we feel things we don’t want to admit to ourselves. Perhaps it’s that we care too much about something that is not serving us. Perhaps it’s that our actions don’t ripple out and affect others. Perhaps we don’t want to admit that we long for something we can’t have. Sometimes it’s character flaws that we can’t admit to, even when someone points them out.

Admitting a flaw in ourselves is difficult, but we all need to do it. How else can we grow? Some of us are fortunate to have someone in our lives, or a few people in our lives, who can accept our flaws, but still point them out to us to keep us straight. It’s a loving thing to do, to tell someone that they need to admit a truth about themselves. Sometimes it’s a good truth, that we haven’t even considered.

Admit can mean to allow in, in the way a ticket allows you to get into a performance, or a movie, or a baseball game. Admitting our errors also allows us in, into humanity, into the universal consciousness, into the one thing that we are all part of. We buy ourselves a ticket as we peel back the layers which bury our souls. We buy a ticket to peace of mind, happiness, joy, and connection.

It’s coincidental, isn’t it, how admitting to some things feels scary, and vulnerable. The truth is that exposing yourself to that vulnerability can lead to a painful experience, but it also can bring you to the birthplace in your soul of every good thing we can have as human beings.

I admit, freely, that writing helps me work things out. My intention with writing is always to find the next layer that needs peeling back. I admit that I want admittance to the human consciousness.

I also can admit that I couldn’t choose just one meaning of “admit”.

Love and light, all.