Dolphins and Sea Birds

Posted on by learning to live like water

I got out for my walk early. I was by the water at about 9 AM. I wanted to get down there early because every Tuesday there’s a fresh market, and it gets really crowded later in the day. I parked along the water and headed toward the long fishing pier. There were only 2 people on the pier when I got there, probably because it’s fairly cloudy this morning, and cool. Perfect for a walk.

As I walked down the pier, a man was walking toward me, and he stopped me. He said, “There’s a dolphin, about 50′ off the end of the pier!” and he pointed in the direction. Just then the dolphin came gliding out of the water and back in. SOOOOO beautiful. I thanked the man profusely, for telling me, lol. Told him it made my day. Because it did. It’s my spirit animal. Such a sight, to see them gracefully swimming in the water.

I got my phone out and began trying to snap pics. I got one in which you can see the dolphin. Just after I took it I saw the fin of a 2nd one!!! I waited and watched but saw neither of them again, so I only have one picture of one dolphin.  It’s small because I had to zoom in and reduce the size of the pic so you could see the dolphin.dolphin-2

When I got to the end of the pier, no one was there, except this pelican and heron. They too are beautiful. What a wondrous place I live in, to see all this with some regularity. So blessed. So grateful.

end-of-pier

Love and light, everyone.  Count your blessings!

The Joy of Being Able to Sleep

Posted on by learning to live like water

I still at times am in disbelief that I now sleep so well. To awaken refreshed, after 8 hours of sleep, good sound sleep, not induced by anything but my own tiredness. It’s a relaxed sleep, a happy sleep. For more than a decade, I have gone to bed exhausted and not slept through the night.

When I first got settled in here, I found myself taking naps. Being unbelievably tired in the middle of the day. I couldn’t understand it. A few short weeks before, I’d been working 10 hours a day, taking care of my big house, doing the laundry and grocery shopping, and cooking and cleaning, and still managing time still with my friends. Not to mention the emotional drama I kept going through, stuck in a cycle like a broken record. A nap was a foreign idea to me.

Suddenly I was napping. I have since stopped. I really don’t need one now. And I don’t like to take them, being the day person I am. I have things to do during daylight hours, and want to get them done. But I think for awhile I had to take naps because there was just so much cumulative tiredness in me. I had been getting by on 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night for so long, and suddenly, I didn’t have to any more. I remember asking myself how a person could sleep so much.

Now I have a small house, just the perfect size for me. I have no emotional drama. I don’t have to go to work. I am happy when I go to bed, content. And so, I sleep most nights. I am so grateful.

Not to say there aren’t those nights when I wake up at 1 AM and my mind begins to go where it will go and I have a hard time getting back to sleep. But it doesn’t make me angry any longer, which always made it even harder to go to sleep. Now I just deal with it, because I don’t have to be anywhere in the morning. I don’t have to go to work and be functional. Sometimes I get up and write, which seems to cure it the best. To just record my stream of consciousness, and what was on my mind. I rarely publish what I write in the wee hours, lol. I usually leave it til morning, to see how I feel, since writing in the dark with my eyes closed is probably not the best way to prepare something for publication. And often I find that I don’t want to publish what I wrote, but I save it. I mark it “unpublished”.

I know I am very blessed to be in a position to live like this. It helps that I am not freezing, in February. It helps that its in the 60’s at night and high 70’s or low 80’s in the day, and the sun shines 90% of the time. It helps that my son calls me every day, and we are as involved in each other’s lives as we ever were. It helps that he’s doing so well, that I have no worries about him. It helps that I have friends here, and am making more friends. It helps that I met L, and that there may be something growing from that, though the jury is still out on that one. I am still happy to know that my interest can be piqued in a man, in every way.

So, sleep….I am so happy to know I can sleep. I never thought I’d be able to say I’m a good sleeper again. But I am.

Love and light to you. And a good night’s sleep too.

Hate Brings Out Another Sicko

Posted on by learning to live like water

The other day my friend Laurel at myjourneyintodarkness.wordpress.com got a vile comment from this guy below.

Hitler88.com

VikingStrongMan.wordpress.com

Vikingdeadlifter@gmail.com

Today I got one, though not as vile as the one he left her, it was still vile, considering the source. He’s the loser with a ego full of hate for everyone, and thinks he’s better than everyone as well. His blog has 2 followers, still, lol. His site is disgusting. This is the comment he left me, on my post “A Call to Action, Again”

“You are dumber then a box of rocks. You would not understand what communism is even if you read the manifesto”

Ok…first of all, I think he’s 28 years old. I’m guessing the 88 in his lovely name of Hitler 88 is his birth year. So of course, he is full of life’s wisdom, compared to mine and Laurels.

He obviously has no scientific education, or he would know that we are all made of the same stardust billions of years old, so we are all dumb as rocks, or as smart, lol, because every molecule that makes up our bodies has always existed. Those molecules can be transformed but not created and not destroyed, so who the hell knows what he was before he was this hate-mongering piece of crap. I tend to love rocks, each one has a different vibration and if the idiot has ever worn a watch it probably kept time to the vibration of the quartz crystal inside it. Of course….maybe he can’t tell time. It’s highly possible he is unable to read the face of a watch. 

As for the communist manifesto, he should shut the fuck up when talking to someone who has lived through the Iron Curtain, the Cuban Missile Crisis, the end of the Korean War, the Viet Nam Conflict, the Berlin Wall, who saw Kruschev beating his shoe on the table at the UN. This little shit head has had it easy, because we all know what it’s like when hate is rampant. When egos drive, and spirits are locked up.  Authoritarian fascism and communism are pretty similar in my book.  A dictator is a dictator is a dictator, no matter the sick ideology they espouse to become one. 

I won’t even go into his disgusting username. Suffice to say I will never see it again on my blog, because he is now blacklisted. His comments will be deleted without me seeing them. Which is all the air time they deserve.

He doesn’t bother me. There will always be haters. There will always be creeps. There will always be more of us than there are of them. Always.

I put up his info, in case any of you want to blacklist him before he has a chance to leave some vile comment on your blog.  To do this go to settings/discussion/comment black list and paste in his info.   If everyone blacklists him, he will have to crawl back under the rock he thinks is so dumb, and wait for eternity to show him the light. Someone that stupid will need all of eternity just to learn how to get his eyes open.

Love and light to everyone.

The Men in My Head

Posted on by learning to live like water

My phone seems hell-bent on playing love songs this morning. I’m feeling kind of in limbo at the moment. I don’t know where this thing with L is going. He often talks about “when I see you” but makes no plans. He stopped calling me half-way through his trip to Ohio, but he sent me pics, and has texted me, often. I guess we are just in a holding pattern, to stay as we were until he gets back. But I can’t even be sure. There is no “I’m looking forward to seeing you again.” But he remembers things I tell him, and asks me about them. I just don’t know. The timing of our meeting has made it a little hard, with him having to go away for 3 weeks, right after we met. Yet, I’m waiting, patiently, because no one else has piqued my interest this much.

Then there is the other one, who shall remain nameless. I wish I could say he’s never on my mind, but he is. Not in a good way, really. Just that we’ve never really been done, even when I think we are. Like Leonard Cohen’s song, “Are we still leaning across the old table?” I hope not, yet, there he is. I am still done. I can’t go there again. My cognizant brain always takes over, and says no way. But he lurks, in the recesses.

Maybe when I can see L regularly, the nameless one will get out of my head. I’m hoping L is on his way home today. I’ve not asked him for an exact day that he’ll be back. I don’t want him to feel like he has to report to me. I’m sure I’ll hear from him when he gets back. I have plenty to keep me busy anyway.

Cookies to make for my son. Herbs to put in pots out on my deck. Tomorrow a dr. appointment for therapy. Errands. And walk. I want to get to the waterfront to take a walk. Gonna do that now.

Love and light.

A Little House Decorating

Posted on by learning to live like water

The air conditioning came back on today. It was 84, at least that’s what my car said. It was awesome!!!I went to Walmart, dropped off the prescriptions I need for my oral surgery, and bought some cookie mixes to make for my son. White Chocolate Macadamia and Snickerdoodle. Then I went to Home Depot and got the correct drill to drill the asbestos tiles on my house, and got some more herbs and pots and organic potting soil.

I came home, and put up my brightly painted gecko on the back of my house, facing my deck. I also put the mermaid sculpture plaque in between the two windows. Then I hung my Buddha on the tree. I also hung the string of lights I got on the tree. I hope they work. They worked in the house, but I couldn’t get them to turn on once I hung them. However, they are solar powered and may just need to charge up. We’ll see. Anyway, these are pictures of the back of my house, and my banyan tree. 🙂

I’m really please with the overall effect on the deck. It is becoming a really pleasant place to sit and write, or read, or meditate. And it’s finally not cold in the mornings. It’s been in the 50’s, 40’s one morning. But it looks like it’s back to the 60’s all week, and the daytime temps are in the low 80’s, which is my favorite temp.

I didn’t get the walk in at the beach today, but honestly, I couldn’t have gone until about 3, and then I wouldn’t have gotten all that stuff put up. Tomorrow I’ll make the cookies, so I can mail them Tuesday. I got to spend the day with myself, which is what I wanted. I’ve talked to friends on the phone, and got a nice long text from L, which made me happy. Seems like things are exactly where I want them for the moment.

Now I’m sitting with a glass of wine, and thinking about making dinner. I have a piece of salmon in marinating, and I have some left over rice, and some veggies in the fridge. Easy peasy dinner. It’s been a great weekend. Me and the critters in my yard, and all of you…..

Still writing like a madwoman, lol.

Love and light to you all.