Really Settling In

Wow! Four nights of good sleep in a row, without any sleep aid. Last night was the best yet! 8 hours, with only one wake up for about a half hour. Awesome! So what is allowing me to sleep so well?

I think that I’ve let old things that caused me anxiety just go. I don’t wake up wondering about them any more, or even caring about them. New things, happy things, have come into my life, and when I wake up, I think of them and go back to sleep. I think I’m finally settling into my new life, and feeling comfortable here.  I am remembering that I named this house Avalon, a mystical place of new beginnings.  There was so much I wanted to let go of from my old life, and so much more I wanted to bring in with my new life.  It’s all happening.  I see that the journey from there to here was the way it was purposefully, bringing me to a much better, happier, fulfilling place.

For instance, tonight is open mic night. Both the friends I usually go with have been sick with bad colds, so I don’t know if either of them will go with me. But I am comfortable enough to go alone, because I know there will be people there that will be happy to include me. I have a circle of people here, and it’s a huge comfort to me, to have a base.

The big work on my house is mostly done now. I still have tree trimming and a shed to put up, but that’s not big stuff. No more workers in my house all day. I have to go curtain shopping for the windows now. The shades I bought will not work with the new windows, so I have to take them back and get something else. Right now my bedroom windows have tablecloths over them, and the living room has towels, lol. I’m going to re-install the blinds I had in the living room, they are fine for the living room. I had the same ones in my bedroom, but they let too much light in. I wanted the better shades I bought, but they won’t work. I think I’ll have to go for room darkening curtains. But that’s ok too. Whatever it takes.

When I was moving furniture yesterday away from the windows, the mirror on my dresser, big heavy mirror, fell off. Apparently the movers had stripped the holes where the screws went. So now I will need help getting it back up. I’m sure my handyman will help me with that. Thank God the mirror did not break. But it so aggravated me that the movers just left it like that.

I’m going to get going early this morning. To take back the shades, to look for curtains and a few other errands. I want to take a good long walk on the beach today. Tomorrow it’s going to get cold. Well, cold for here, lol. High of 60. By Sunday it will be back to 80, happily.

Lots of good things happening. I still pinch myself every day, I’m so amazed that I have this wonderful life here. Just so blessed, so lucky. When my sister and I were shopping, we were waiting in line to pay. She remarked that it was 3 PM. I said, “Oh good, we will have time to get into the hot tub for awhile and have a glass of wine before we go down to sunset.” Then I looked at her, hearing myself, and said, “It’s a rough life isn’t it? LOL.” She said “Thank you for reminding me…..” We both know how lucky we are.

Love and light, everyone.

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Mercury Retrograde, Again

Mercury is retrograde starting December 19. The last time Mercury went retrograde, I was worried because my son and I were both moving starting new lives, and it is generally not a good time to start new things, especially big new things. Well as it turned out, it was all ok. Both moves went off without a hitch, both cars ran well. Although, my car was totaled 2 weeks after retrograde ended, lol. I did a little backsliding emotionally just before the move, at the middle of the retrograde, but that was to be expected I guess. Big changes.

This time it’s the day of the electoral college vote.

I’m looking at my last two posts, I think I’ve already started backsliding because of the retrograde effects. They can start a couple weeks before. I’m backsliding like crazy tonight, to a place I know is not good for me. It gives me strength to recognize it. I found an article from the Farmer’s Almanac that describes how it affects different signs. I’m an Aries, it says “Expect to be frustrated and frazzled. Assertive,
 impulsive Aries wants to move
 ahead, and all of the energy is going backward. Watch what you say and how you say it. Pay attention to what people say to you; you might be pleasantly surprised. If you want to look up your own sign, here’s the link: http://www.almanac.com/content/mercury-retrograde-and-zodiac-signs

I used to have a friend who worked for an airline, in their call center, making reservations for people. She worked there fore 30 years. Whenever Mercury went retrograde, or there was a full moon, they sent a notice out to the people at the call center warning them. Because communication gets all screwed up in Mercury retrograde. And people get crazy under the full moon.

But the point I wanted to make is, maybe Mercury retrograde will influence the electoral college to do something it’s never done. To save us from ourselves. Maybe they will slide in a way different than all the other electoral colleges. Considering the enormous amount of energy directed at them begging them to do so.

A Course in Miracles defines a miracle as a change in perception from fear to love. If enough electors do this, it will be a miracle, as defined this way.

If I can backslide the way I am, into feelings and emotions I have let go of under most circumstances, then maybe the electors cognizance of what is about to happen to this country will be altered. Maybe their perception of fear of not voting the way they were originally promising can be change to a perception of doing something loving for this country.

It’s a long shot, isn’t it. But it’s a hope. Not one I put much store in, but it would be a miracle.

Or this could all be a crazy dream I am having. You know, Pollyanna syndrome. I want everything to end up happy ever after, and with a clean ending.

I’m usually disappointed. But not always.

Love and light.

Music and Friends (or why I was so tired last night, lol)

Open mic is such a cool thing in this little town. I was supposed to meet my friend Beth there. She said she was going early to practice a song with a couple of guitar players, but when I got there she wasn’t there yet. The friend I’d run into Wednesday was there, sitting with a few other friends, and he right away motioned for me to come over and sit with them, which I did.

I got into a conversation with a woman who I was only acquainted with before, when I asked how everyone’s week was. She was telling me if it could go wrong it did, lol. Then we got into a discussion about how Mercury turns retrograde Monday the 19th. And kind of wondering what effect that will have on the Electoral College vote that day. Mangia Gourmet Cafe is a rare place in FL where you will not find any Trump supporters, so it’s safe to talk openly about him, and not expect any arguments.

Beth showed up, and as is her way, she flits from table to table because she has known everyone for so long. She kind of settled across the table from me, next to our awesome transgender friend G. G is 69 years old, and trans-ing from male to female. She is so open, and funny and she sings beautifully. Next to G was a performer who comes up from Sarasota, about an hour away, on a regular basis. The table was rounded out with D, the wife of the shows MC, who is an actress, having taught acting her whole life, but is now retired. She and her husband are equity actors, meaning they get paid for their work, lol. However, she considers herself a sculptor. I have not seen her work. Such a lovely funny person.

We were talking about the music they were all playing, and I leaned into the table and said, “I am waiting for someone to get up and do some Van Morrison. I’ve never heard anyone sing him here.” B, the guy from Sarasota, nodded his head, and looked like he was thinking about what I’d said. Well, when it came to his turn to sing, he first did Harvest Moon (Neil Young), then maybe one of his own compositions. Most everyone was doing just 2 songs, but we kind of egged him on to do another. The MC told him to go ahead, and B said, “Ok, well I have a request…” and he pointed at me and began singing “Moondance.” So everyone at our table started clapping. Somehow he transitioned Moondance into California Dreaming and that into All Along the Watchtower absolutely seamlessly. It was so awesome! When he was done I gave him a big hug, thanking him for all of it, especially Moondance.

There are always makeshift bands that play together, to back someones music up. My friend Beth did her two songs, but then joined in a bunch of others. Everyone loves her to sing with them, because she knows all the music, and can sing harmonies without thinking about it, and puts on a fun show while she’s up there. The last song of the night was Minnie the Moocher, (old Cab Calloway). They had 6 or 7 performers up front, and Beth was singing the scat part of it, she is so good at that and loves to do it. Everyone laughing and clapping, everyone having a good time.

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“Minnie the Moocher” at Mangia Gourmet

At the end of the night, a few people were saying how Mangia is needing a bigger space. Because it does get really busy, people are out on the sidewalks.

God, what a fun night.

Tonight is my date. I got a text from him last night saying he hoped I enjoyed my open mic night, and that he was really looking forward to tonight. So am I!.

What a rough life, lol. I slept til 7:30 this morning, that is SOO late for me! But I’m glad, hopefully it will mean I won’t get tired so soon tonight.

Love and light everyone.

A Grateful Start to the Day

I had the best night’s sleep I’ve had in days, slept 8 hours and that’s a real feat for me. I suppose the 3 glasses of wine I had while sitting outside with my sister and one of her friends in the evening really helped me to relax. It’s so awesome, to be celebrating TG here. I know, that’s very redundant. I’ve been talking about it for weeks, I think. But each day, I am grateful again as the feeling washes over me.

I made it to the town dock for sunrise this morning. It did not disappoint. Oddly, no one else was there. Perhaps because it’s a holiday, everyone is busy with cooking and planning and getting things ready. It’s slightly warmer here than where I live. And I only life about 30 miles north as the crow flies. But the temps this morning were in the low 60’s instead of high 50’s and it’s supposed to get to the low 80’s. These are some pictures.

I was kind of grateful that no one else was there this morning. It allowed me to do a bit of meditation. To kind of slide into the spirit of the day, the spirit of gratitude. I read these words by Anne Lamott a few days ago on her FB page, and I so loved them. This is a copy and paste of the short post. I think it’s fitting for today. My heart is full of gratitude that my life has turned out the way it has, so far.

” We pray to be mindful of the needs of others. We savor these moments out of time, when we are conscious of love’s presence, of Someone’s great abiding generosity to our dear and motley family, these holy moments of gratitude. And that is grace.”

I hope everyone has a wonderful day, with family and friends. Love and light to all.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Art

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This is a Stream of Consciousness Saturday post.  The writing prompt this week is “Art”.  for more information on this fun writing prompt, see https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/29/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-3016/.  Linda Hill has a great blog, and great ideas for writing prompts.  This is my second attempt at her SoCS.

ART

A picture was painted this morning
By the artist-at-large
In this world.

It is a sensory work of art,
the green of the leaves on the trees,
The blue of the sky
the scent of lavender,
the cool, almost imperceptible breeze,
rustling the leaves,
gently caressing my body.
The rich cup of coffee in front of me.
The sound of birds singing,
Neighbors dogs barking
And oddly the sound of cars on the road in the far distance.

I try to recreate the painting
With my words.
I try to make the reader feel it,
Because it seems too fabulous not to share.

I suppose that is what art is, to me.
The sharing of our emotions in such a way
As to evoke a similar response
Or a response at all,
From someone else.

I love art that makes me feel.
I love a book, or a post, or a movie, or a painting,
Or a piece of jewelry or pottery or a poem
That can make me cry, or laugh hysterically.

I want to feel.
Feeling lets me know I’m alive.
Art lets me know I’m alive,
When it makes me feel.
Inspires me to feel.

I hope that I also do that
In some small way
With my art.
With my writing,
Or my jewelry.
I hope it inspires people to feel.
Mostly to feel good.
To broaden their perspective,
To lift their gaze.

Or, just leaves someone a little happier for having run across it.
Art, is, it seems,
A wonderful way to extend love in this world.